Ever since I came to JBU, I have been changed in a few ways. I seem to value relationships with my family members more. (Before, I just basically disregarded them and was eager to get away from home.) I am also learning to be dependent on God. Being far away from family and friends has probably caused this. I have also been humbled. I came to John Brown thinking that I would strive to be valedictorian (since I was valedictorian of my high school), but calculus and other classes have changed that.
As for what I want, I am not exactly sure. There is always the typical answer, “Oh, I want to have a closer relationship with God.” However, I am doing nothing to foster that, so I would sound hypocritical if I did say that.
Recently, God did instill in me the desire to work with people who are mentally and physically disabled. Whether I will just care for basic needs, become a nurse, or be a doctor has yet to be decided/revealed. This decision comes largely from the fact that I have never really been talented at socializing with people who are “normal,” especially those my own age. Another factor that played into this decision was a mission trip to Jamaica in February 2011. While there, I had the opportunity to go to West Haven, a home for children who are disabled. I immediately felt a connection to the people there, even though some of them could not talk. I am excited to see what God has in store for me and how He will use me!
1. Will fear of the unknown paralyze me from acting on what I know God wants me to do (whether it is a career or any other task)?
2. What other changes will God make in me while I am here at JBU?
The fear you talk about is something I understand very well Leah. Years ago I felt called into the ministry. I felt called to help the AIDS orphans who cannot help themselves. This past summer I got the chance to go to Guatemala on a short term medical mission trip. I was so excited to go and see the world, and see if that is truly what God has called me to do. On our last day there, strikes and protests broke out that blocked the roads. I was literally stuck in a foreign country with a group of people I only barely knew. The fear of those days trying to get back home, back to safety will forever be instilled in my mind. After finally getting home I was completely ready to change my entire career goal, but then I was reminded of something. God didn't call me to do something bigger than what he can do through me. Yes, at some times I still fear what my future holds, but I just keep reminding myself of the God who controls my future, and the fear of the children who have no parents and no dinner.
ReplyDeleteI wish you could "Like" things like you can on Facebook. :D *Like* for Leah's post and Hannah's comment. :)
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